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Friday, June 8, 2012

Take What You Need

Why do we hurt others?


 
I have been troubled by the recent Seattle shootings. Shootings happen daily and each is tragic, but this one has been difficult for me to come to terms with. I kept thinking about it throughout the days following. I found that I was diverting conversations to it with anyone who would listen. No doubt, a lot of it is because it was in Seattle, a place I have always seen as relatively peaceful and as a home. We are always jolted more when horrific events take place in our immediate environment or somewhere we are familiar with. I think another, and perhaps larger,  part of it is the fact that it took place in the University District and so close to “The Ave,” which has always been a haven of sorts for me. I think many of us have a place like this we go to. It’s the one we find ourselves at when the world begins to get us down. Often, when I was feeling disappointed in people and the conformity of daily life, I would be pulled toward its promise of uniqueness and expression. I have spent many an afternoon walking the district, and especially, “The Ave,” in search of inspiration and in search of peace--often filling a backpack with some food and a book and heading on foot from my apartment.

The district is a busy area full of action and sounds and overflowing with culture, but it always seemed to mesh together in a manner that seemed peaceful to me. Everyone and everything had a role in making it what is was. Cities often cause a segregation of its citizens, naturally and forced. But all walks of life are represented there, especially this street in particular. It lies as a border between the idealism flowing from the university and the practicality of the city...and it has the feel of such a blend.


After I heard the news of the shooting, I could see the street, just as I remembered it, full of the distinct life I have been trying to describe in this entry. As I read the details of the story, I could visualize all the places. I saw myself sitting in coffee shops and browsing bookstores or walking around aimlessly with my ipod.

And I could see one memory even clearer, as it stood out starkly and disturbingly from the others.

I once took a group of former students down that street on a Sunday afternoon. We walked up and down each side, silently and discretely observing our surroundings. I asked them to see everyone that they passed. Not in a judgmental way. I wanted them to look at each person as an individual with a personality, a background, as a fellow member of their community in the hopes of helping them better realize how diverse our community is and how rich in culture it can be if we open our eyes and our arms. I also asked them to address their stereotypes and judgments. I wanted them to believe that there is no need to feel uncomfortable--that we should be aware and smart, but not afraid in the presence of those we do not yet know--that If you treat people like people, they will act like people.

While, I still believe this, I cannot come close to stating it as fact, and recent events make my case harder to plead. My credibility has certainly taken a hit...but I do still believe this. 

This story hit me hard because it robbed me of some of my trust and faith. I wouldn’t say that I was naive to the possibility of such a tragedy, but I trusted that it wouldn’t happen...not in this place...not in my place of harmony.

A strong theme in my classes has always been the idea of emotional voids. I am constantly stressing the belief that people act the way they do in order to fill voids. From teasing, to bullying, to the cruelest of actions, we are responding to our lacking. In short, people hurt people to try and stop their own hurting. People are always going to have voids. What we can do is recognize their voids or at the very least understand that they are hurting. Perhaps we may even be able to offer what they need. More importantly, we can learn to recognize our own voids and what is causing them, and we can fill them, not with hurt, but with that which we are truly needing.

When we stop hurting others to stop our hurting, we will be on the road to peace.


Until then, I’ll keep walking “The Ave.”



 
I think one of my students said it best by posting this on the bulletin board in my room.